Someone said that in the spiritual life you are always at the beginning. I wish that I had taken that phrase on board earlier in my life. If I had let myself be an eternal beginner, I think I would have had a lot less anxiety.
Instead of expecting to know exactly what I was doing, professional and confident at all times, I could have instead lightheartedly ‘had a go’ , engaged with joy and curiosity, instead of with trepidation and dogged, internal criticism.
Beginners are forgiven for mistakes and praised for participating. They are encouraged for taking a chance and validated for trying. They are not expected to know the ropes; how could they?
Some other spiritual soul said, leap and the net will appear. Maybe leaping is a bridge too far for me right now, but falling could be something I could consider.
And so I venture forth on the highways and byways, trapezes and tightropes, with a beginner’s perspective and a beginner’s heart and a firm safety net in place. I reckon falling again and again into the strong, secure net of my own acceptance, could be rather wonderful.